What Ticks Him Off?

As we discussed earlier, the better student you are of your husband the easier it is to avoid the things which upset him.  You might even feel like the Peanuts cartoon where Lucy looks at Snoopy & says, “There are times when you really bug me, but I must admit there are also a lot of times when I feel like giving you a big hug.”  Snoopy replies:  “That’s the way I am… huggable and buggable!”  What do you think?  Ever feel like you are married to a man who is huggable one minute and buggable the next, or maybe more importantly, getting under your skin the next?  I have certainly felt that way at times.  This job of not ticking off our husbands sometimes seems too hard so we resort to trying to change him to be what we want him to be: Linda Dillow refers to this in her book, Creative Counterpart;

      • “Many times the desire to change a husband springs from selfish motives because a wife’s real focus is on herself.”

We often irritate our husbands because we are always trying to change the little (& sometimes big) things about them that keep bugging us.  We are selfish creatures.  Of course there are time times my husband has been doing something that gets on my nerves. When I make myself stop and pray in earnest  for God to change me to fit him  or just accept him the way he is instead of trying to change my husband to fit me the outcome has a much more pleasant aroma.  Always focus on what you can do about yourself first.

  •  The 4 general land minds we can try to avoid that are common to most of our men and will help keep them from getting ticked off are:
      • Comparison
      • Communication- or lack thereof
      • Finances
      • Manipulation

First, Comparison:

 “Let your eyes look directly ahead & let your gaze be fixed straight in front of you.”  Proverbs (4:25)

What happens when we look around at other marriages, other husbands, homes, and children?  When we compare, one of two things is going to happen:

1-    we look and see that what we have is better (arrogance- pride)

2-    we look and see that what we have looks worse (discontent with what God has given me)

Both are sin!  It is much better for me to look at my own problems and work at correcting them.  Chuck Swindoll once said:  “Marriage is not so much finding the right person as it is being the right person.”

Comparison focuses on the outside but becoming the right person focuses on the inside.  Remember that a wise woman builds her house, but a foolish one tears it down with her own hands (Proverbs 14:1)  Next time we will look at Communication, but for today, remember:

Comparison is a sure fire way to: Make you discontent and Tear down your home and marriage

 

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. DFPCosmeticServices
    Feb 13, 2014 @ 12:34:41

    Wonderful words of wisdom Virginia ❤

    Reply

  2. ginicraven
    Feb 13, 2014 @ 15:29:46

    Thanks so much. I really appreciate that:)

    Reply

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